Thought for the day

How come... when a pregnant woman gets cravings - they never crave the taste of sperm?

Bread and butter in the gutter

On Saturday it will be my 34th birthday! The only problem is when the wife / kids / parents / parents-in-law / friends / neighbours / imates ask me what i want for my birthday present my answer is always "nothing". This happens every year (at xmas too) and annoys the hell out of my Wife and Parents especially. I usually manage to get hold of any gadgets that i want and DVDs and Music are pretty much free these days too. Other than that - i want for pretty much nothing. Its all part of my Zen / Bhuddist / Low-fi mystique... The only things i can currently think of are as follows: 1. A bike computer - so i can see how fast i am not going. 2. A "skin" for my nice new iPod - already got scrapes on the screen. 3. An extending charge/sync cable for the iPod - so i don't have to carry to much. 4. A Mac Mini - too much cash though. 5. The new Harry Potter book - so i can actually *read* something before my eyes scab over (or does this not count). 6. A bike helmet - although i don't really want one cos they look gay. So - one present from the wife, one from the kids, one from the parents and one from the parents in law. That should just about cover it is suppose. No-ones gonna buy me the Mac Mini though. *sob* What else do you get the man who has everything - and can download what he does'nt have? Socks..... thats what. Ps... Thanks to mouse for the pic too by the way!

Pearl Handled Revolver

A totally biased link to a band my nephew Luke and sister in laws boyfriend, Lee, are part of: Pearl Handed Revolver. You can post comments here if you don't want to sign up for a Myspace account. They sound pretty good to me!

Phrase of the day

"tefal head" I have said it three times to three different people today - and its only just lunchtime! Too much Stella Lager make brain go num....

iPod, uPod, We all iPod

Today i have been mostly listening to: Why is it that i prefer to listen to "old" tracks than new ones?

Dead-enders

After catching a few minutes of Coronation Street by proxy last night i noticed that the soap producers have wheeled out Craig Charles, another cheeky chappie comedian/actor to "spice up" the show and boost the ratings. Since Eastenders gave us Shane Richie in the guise of Alfie Moon the other soaps have been playing the comedian catch up. Corrie has only so far managed to bring on Bradley Walsh as their comedy "wild card" but at least Eastenders has the decency to make Shane Ritchie into a simpering wet-gel wearing twit - and not be too serious about the whole thing. Maybe they realised that it was all getting too depressing and tried to stop their viewers rushing to drink bleach as soon as they heard the opening bars of the theme tune. About time. I expect Emmerdale to roll out Keith Harris and Orville any time soon...

Moist Haunted

Having spent another 3 evenings half watching Most Haunted Live i have yet again been left with the feeling that it is all a bit of a con. For those who are not aware of this program i shall give a brief synopsis. Psychic medium Derek Acorah accompanies presenter Evette Fielding and paranormal investigators to a number of locations in search of ghosts. The program is usually pre-recorded but they also do a "live" version usually over 2/3 nights on times like Halloween or the Summer Solstice. We started watching this a while ago now and found it quite interesting seeing the various phenomona occuring - knockings, noises, seances, ouiija boards, light annomalies (orbs) and possessions too! It is all wearing a little thin now. We like listening to the history of the places the investigate and some of the things they have seen could not be easily explained - but 99% of them can. The best show was the Live Halloween special last year at Pendle Hill when they were persued from location to location by a collection of witches who were appearing to wreak havoc with the members of the film crew and presenters. Last night they were investigating an old disued mine at Wakefield and whilst in one of the mine shafts heard a few ghostly snorts and had a few stones thrown at them supposedly by the ghosts of 8 children who had died there in an accident. I suppose what you forget as a viewer is that you might be watching the presenters, the psychic medium and the paranormal scientist sceptic walking round but there are also other 3 members of the film crew, sound department, a burly security man, cable guys and even the make up lady, "Cath" - who always seems to get her hair touched by ghosts, gets to go too! Surely with all those people there in an old mine shaft that has not been entered for 40 years or so - something would get disturbed and that could be seen as paranormal. Some of the show is done by people alone with night vision cameras who are brave enough to venture off into pitch black rooms, cellars and attics. Those are the better bits i think as the reactions and emotions are more real and less prone to group hysteria or suggestion - or are they just good actors? If you look at the show objectively then you could argue that if it was all "made up" then something amazing would happen each time they went to a location. But it does not. They sometimes get nothing at all - even on the pre-recorded shows. The fact that they show this fact does give them some credibility - or is that what they are thinking too? As for me? I am sceptical but remain open minded. Until they see something totally unusual and the scientist boffins on the show cannot explain it and I cannot explain it either, then i might start to believe. Most Haunted people...if you are reading this... i'll come on the show - prove me wrong!

Lament for the WhiteBoy

My mate Mr Whiteboybob has made a post on his blog that he will be ceasing his blogging activities from now on. I have been on the brink of giving up several times due to "bloggers block" and just general blogging apathy - nothing to say/nobody cares etc... I can remember lying in bed one night thinking about how pointless my blog was and that i was only chasing for new readers and checking the number of comments each time i went on. I started my Blog to help people use Bittorrent but now I was possibly writing stuff to provoke a discussion. I nearly got up and deleted all my posts but i am glad i did'nt. I'm sure he will see sense and try again. After your template has cocked up several times and you are in a bit of a "blue funk" anyway, your blogging seems pointless and a chore. Some people say to blog every day but this is not always possible. As my girlfriend used to say - "when i am feeling down i always see bad in our relationship". Needless to say, that was not the girl i married! Since we are all (nearly) married off with kids and mortgages, the circle of friends i used to move within has become very fragmented and i actually have'nt seen the Whiteboy properly for years and years - even though at one time i would have called him and his wife my best friends. Now that he is into Blogging i feel that i have got that link back to him and to loose that again would be a real shame.

Techy Template Update

If anyone wants to know how i did my own "I've got an iPod" ribbon thing in the top right hand corner of the blog, or how i did my value based comment indicator then leave me a message and i will let you know. Or do you want me to make you a ribbon? Leave me a comment with the text you want and i will oblige! Maybe is should do some Live8 ones for people to have on their sites...

What devilry is this?

The Tooth Tairy, Easter Bunny and all the other happy elves of the world have visited me today and in reward for being such a good little Technical Goblin, and for not spanking the wifey any more after she says the panic word ("Northampton") they have given me "the prize". Something i have been longing for enternally. The sleek silver and white gift bears the magical 20GB rune and has been carefully crafted from the shaven pubic hairs of the nunnery virgins at the Ogre factories of App-le. It now adorns my work chamber desk whilst its Dylithium Crystals recharge and it tells me to "Do not Disconnect" which is now also my new Goblin Army warcry. My life is now complete. "Death...? take me now - i'm done".